Christmas Presents

by Inside Joke

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  • Streaming + Download

    Pre-order of Christmas Presents. You get 2 tracks now (streaming via the free Bandcamp app and also available as a high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more), plus the complete album the moment it’s released.
    Purchasable with gift card
    releases November 22, 2019

      $7 USD  or more

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Turn Christmas Presents into an actual Christmas Present with this limited edition Compact Disc! Get them while supplies last! The first 15 orders receive an ultra-rare inside joke sticker.

    Includes digital pre-order of Christmas Presents. You get 2 tracks now (streaming via the free Bandcamp app and also available as a high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more), plus the complete album the moment it’s released.
    digital album releases November 22, 2019
    item ships out on or around November 21, 2019
    edition of 200 

      $13 USD or more 

     

1.
03:00
2.
Butter Dem Rolls (Holiday Remix) [feat. Cassius Clay]
3.
03:48
4.
Joy (feat. DJ Wize)
5.
Christmas PJ's
6.
Cardboard Christmas (intro)
7.
Cardboard Christmas
8.
La Misa Del Gallo (feat. Natesty and Maddie Bair)
9.
Fruitcake
10.
Lights On My House (Remastered)
11.
Keep the Receipt (feat. Kevin Schuer)
12.
Yule Log
13.
'Twas the Night Before Christmas
14.
Christmastime at Mamaw's (Memories Mix)

about

I had a few Christmas songs in the bag. A couple of songs previously appeared as bonus tracks and I even recorded a few new ones over the past couple of years that have sat idle on my computer. At the end of last year, I made a goal to release a full-length Christmas album in 2019. I love Christmas music, after all, and it only seemed right that I release a Christmas classic for families to enjoy every year—as many have longed for Inside Joke music that they can blast all 12 months (we all know that only Christmas music is allowed to be played October through December).

As the year churned on I had nothing. I had some great concepts, but no songs to show for it. I even had music. Occasionally I would find a Christmasy sound that I would save and so I had several tracks that were perfect for an Inside Joke Christmas album. But I had nothing that seemed very funny or clever lyric-wise. Time was ticking.

In my alternate universe known as real life, our family was met with a surprise. We were going to have child number six! Not long after learning this news we learned that our new daughter, Wylie, had a genetic disorder known as Trisomy 18. Uncertain if she would live, we headed to the UK Children’s Hospital to welcome her to this world on May 8th. Live she did! She began to exceed all expectations. A couple of months in the NICU and we were home where we had five wonderful weeks with her before she started to struggle with breathing. We headed back to the UK PICU where we would stay for over two months. During this time, Wylie had multiple procedures and open-heart surgery to repair three tiny holes in her tiny heart.

It was here in the PICU where one night I was feeling as though the Joy of life was being sucked out of me. As quickly as that thought came, it was met with a reminder of Paul’s words in the book of Colossians 3:1-4:

Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is now hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.”

As I was thinking about this, my mind wandered off to a Christmas song idea from a year or so ago that centered on the idea of Joy and the failure of Christmas presents to provide real lasting Joy. Perhaps it was aided by the fact that my son Beau had decided to start obsessing about a Christmas present he wanted this year (yes in the middle of summer). I sat down and in a few minutes on my laptop had a new Christmas song, Joy. Over the next several days at the hospital, the floodgates opened and several new songs emerged during late nights typing on my laptop next to Wylie. Those times were true moments of relief from the intensity of Wylie’s situation. I was able to squeeze in some time to record the songs while at home. My friend Kevin Schuer coming over to record his vocals and provided me with some of the hardest laughter I had experienced in months (Keep The Receipt). Recording myself telling Karla to “fix me something to eat” on Christmas Eve while decked out in some ridiculous Christmas pajamas makes me laugh even now (Christmas PJs). I got a few hard laughs out challenging Nate to be more dramatic as he performed his Spanish lyrics (La Misa Del Gallo). I think Karla even had enjoyed the comedic relief recording her part on Cardboard Christmas Intro.

So today is the day that I had set to hit the ‘send button” and officially release these “Christmas Presents” to the world (and yes, I use the term “Christmas” loosely). Yet, last night, while finishing things up, we had to return to the hospital after Wiley had her first experience with Seizures. So as I write this I’m back on the hospital floor where I was with Wiley and God reminded me of the Joy that comes only from Christ—only from setting our minds on the things above and looking beyond the sadness and even absurdity of this world… Yes, even the absurdity that has become “Christmas” these days. I’m reminding myself of this great truth again as I hit the official “send” button on yet another collection of foolish songs. To be sure, the joy of Christ is not the same as being able to laugh at funny stuff. But it the joy of the Lord may be the only means by which we can laugh in the middle of pain.

Christmas Presents is dedicated Wiley and the staff at the UK Children’s hospital who have saved her life on multiple occasions… including last night! For she is our miraculous Christmas present from God! I prayed she would be home for Christmas this year and as I type today I still have the faith and confidence that will happen! She continues to remind us of His real power to heal, to save, and to even deliver real joy in the middle of the most difficult of times. I look forward to laughing with her this Christmas at home as we seek to break through into the real mystery of Christmas and celebrate the God that made her perfect in HIs image! Yes, the God that came to earth as a lowly baby but grew up to display the love, grace, and joy of God to a broken world. I’m not sure if you will get any of that out of these goofy satirical songs (it would be stretch to do so… I’ll admit), but if laughter is the best medicine then perhaps they will bring little healing to you and your family this Christmas!

The Destination Is The Journey,

Inside Joke (aka Gavin Duerson)

November 4th, 2019

credits

releases November 22, 2019

Props to Cassius Clay for a lot of the good ideas and lyrics.
Kevin Schuer for the butta vocals once again (Keep the Receipt)
Natesty and Maddie Bair for holding it down on La Misa Del Gallo
Lady K for the fun on Cardboard Christmas (intro)

Most of all Wylie and the staff at UK Children's Hospital (see "about this album")

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Inside Joke Lexington, Kentucky

What started out as an "inside joke" has turned into a world-wide movement... sort of. From Lexington, KY, Inside Joke takes rap music back to the days when it was fun, made you dance, and actually rhymed! At the same time, Inside Joke brings a new school vibe, spirituality at times, and a little country grammar to boot! ... more

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Track Name: Black Friday
Wake up thanksgiving, boy am I’m thankful
For about 5 minutes then I rush to get a paper
Check the doorbusters listed in the ads
Gotta see what kinda stuff this year I Gotta have

Cuz about 6 the stores they be open
First in line is what I’m hoping
This Thanksgiving, I be having lots a needs
Like a big ole huge 40” flat screen

But I’ll have to beat the rush to get me one of these
So I hurry up and wolf down my thanksgiving feast
All my homies be at my house for the big game
When I snatch me a forty-inch on this Black Friday!

Chorus
Black Friday, Black Friday
We going door bustin on Black Friday
Black Friday, Black Friday
You know we door bustin on Black Friday

Spent a few minutes with my family,
Then jumped in the car, me Cassius and Double Deez
Door busting, on a mission for a new flatscreen
Only thing better than one is three

Hit up Target for our first stop
Line at the door stretch halfway around the block
I knew it was for the 40 inch so we bolted
Kohls will be better - we wuz hoping

Busted through the door “sorry we’re sold out of TV’s”
So we grabbed some chia pets and 12-foot trampoline
Used Kohls Cash then rolled to Wall-Mart
Jumped out the car and grabbed us a cart

Snuck in the back, sped for the TV isle
On the way there started to compile
Emoji pillows, doorbuster underwear
Discount DVDs and holiday cookware

Cart overflowing as I peep the TV section
only 6:30, but not much selection
Then I see a big stack of elements - TV goldmine!
My 40” flat screen for 299!

Chorus

Two hours later, left Walmart without much a scene
If ya don’t count the lady that tried to punch me
didn’t care that I got the TV,
Got mad cuz I grabbed the last holiday pack of ladies shaving cream

Had to get a little something for Lady K
Cuz the TV’s about football on thanksgiving day
Got home, hooked it up, watched the big game
Then hit the sack, cuz tomorrow it officially… Black Friday!
Track Name: Grinchin
October I get up like a reindeer
Christmas music whole fourth quarter of the year
It’s the fall but it cam ea midnight clear
So straight to my closet get out my Christmas gear

Christmas Sweater comes with a battery pack
First cold day at the office I be catchin flack
From Agnus Agifer Jermaine and Jack
Cuz with my Christmas sweater I rock my Christmas hat

Halloween? Naw… I skip it
No death, straight to the light of Christmas
Scowl all ya want, but time ya listen
Christmas is coming, why you be grinchin?

Chorus
They be Grinching (whoo whoo) They be Grinchin

I like to protest at the local manger scene
tell all kids Saint Nicholas make-believe
stay home for the holidays to remain unseen
By my friends, neighbors, and my family

You say merry Christmas I’ll say happy holiday
Bah Humbug at the Chrismas parade!
If it’s got to do with Jesus I be throwing shade
I’ll even punch Santa if that’s what it takes

One time I did, knocked the jolly right out of the elf
And speaking of elf, what’s up with the one on the shelf?
Too many families engaging in fantasy
It's Dangerous for kids and parents to play make-believe!

Says a study I read on the internet somewhere
Its abuse to kids! And for those without presents its unfair
But you don’t care it’s obvious
All your Christmas lights, music, and parties it's obnoxious!

Chorus

Snowflakes get offended at the mention of the season
Saying “Merry Christmas” like the same as treason
They be Grinchin no listening to reason
They trying to steal Christmas-they thieving!

But da Grinch found he couldn’t steal Christmas
Unlike the religious, found that Christmas is within us
It’s about a gift that only God can give us
That we celebrate with fests of roast beast -delicious

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