1. Carpet On Ya Chest (Old School Sexy Mix) Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry and Inside Joke Chorus: If you got a carpet on ya chest say hey! "Hey!" If you got a carpet on ya chest say ho! "Ho!" If you got a carpet on ya chest say hey! "Hey!" If you got a carpet on ya chest say ho! "Ho!" I take my shirt off, cause it helps me stay humble But come to find out I be making the girls stumble Where I'm from a hairy chest be out But apparently around here a hairy chest will give ya clout Take for example, just the other day I was running around my block just to stay in shape As usual no shirt, thinking nothing of it Little did I know the college girls be loving it I was thinking, "It's so nice to run with my shirt off" When I hear this girl yell, "David Hasselhoff!" Was she talking to me? You know she be! Looking at me dreaming of Hasselhoff on da beach Chorus: I remember when my homeboy "Morg" dared me to shave it All the trash cans in the world couldn't contain it It was all over the floor, all over the counter "Morg" had never seen this amount of Chest hair...as I was shaving When I was through yo the feeling was amazing I be feeling the same thing the Indians be feeling Silky smooth chest yo you best be believing That I looked good my chest was gleaming Two weeks later all I was doing was screaming Call my boy "Morg," Yo i was ticked No more silky-smooth, all i feel is itch And after the pain left, you know it came back No more out-door carpet it was a shag attack Five years later more than ever that's a fact Last time i checked it was creeping on my back Chorus: This ain't no happy trail, I got a magic carpet My baby's momma be the only one to ride on it Most of my friends don't understand my zeal But then again they don't look like George The Animal Steele So when it comes to you, Yo what's your deal? Shaving your pecks? Man you can't be for real I be getting looks all around, below, and above My hair so long I could donate to Locks of Love In L.A., they thought i was Austin Power's cuzz Ladies on the beach saying "Did you see who dat was?" You know it was me, the J O K to the E All you Ambercrombie models don't impress me Baring your boring, hairless chest for all to see Man please! You need to hit puberty Going to the beach with your sunscreen, not me 50 SPF from God Grow you some hair fool, cause hair is a must! You be washing with soap, i got to use Pert Plus Now my hair be shinning gleaming with that silky smooth feeling I even got them boys from Jodeci "feenin"

2. Feels Like Love Words By Inside Joke and Trent Owens Music By Bobby Perry, Inside Joke Trent Owens Guitars by John Hatfield February 14, 1989 That day be forever sired into my mind That's the day I went to my first middle school dance Rocked a clip on tie, suit jacket and pants To top it off, I had my first date with a hunny Took me a whole month to tell my moms and my poppy Practiced dancing in secret so no one could top me Emulating all the moves of Whitney and Bobby Even got my girl a wrist corsage Flower so big take up most of her forearm Shaved for the first time, put on some hair gel Come down the stairs, mom says I'm looking swell Trying to get out the door, don't wanna be late The phone rings... Yo! it's my date "Can't wait to see you" is what she said My palms all sweaty and I'm thinking in my head... Chorus: It feels like love (x4) My moms drops me off, I nervously go inside Pay my 2 dollars head straight for the guys At the snack table, downing Cheeto Puffs and soda Everybody's cologne combining for one nasty oder Oh shoot, there's my girl chatting with her friends Don't know what to say so I pretend That, I don't see her as I'm chilling on the wall Milli Vanilli bumping but know one dancing at all "Go dance with her!," my homies give the dare They push me onto the dance floor, I'm the only one there Act like i don't care, as all the girls stare Next thing you know they're heading to the bathroom in pairs Try my best not to look as she strolls by my way But it's too late, eye contact is made She's just waved at me, Uh Oh now she's winking I'm feeling all tingly and now I'm thinking... Chorus: The DJ playing Bust A Move I muster up the nerve and that is what I do Walk across the cafeteria she's standing there Try to find the words, as I'm staring at her poofy hair "Would you like to dance?" I managed to say "Yeah!" she said, then I showed her the way To the dance floor, the DJ's playing Richard Marx "I'll be Waiting For You" I hear the song start Not sure what to do, but what the heck I put my hands around her hips she put her arms around my neck Then we start move side to side to the beat Trying to make sure that I don't step on her feet But that was easy, cause we be standing far away Moving in constant circles as we sway "Does it feel OK the way I'm dancing here?" She leaned over and whispered in my ear...

3. Inside Out Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry Additional Vocals by Cassius Clay Yo, he working on my so I clap it out The changes on the inside making me shout If he's the living water, my mouth is the spout Spitting rhymes so you won't be without An explanation of what The Joke is all about It's not my crew, but its Him that give me clout The changes on the inside got me on a different route Viewing each day like the title bout Chorus: Now if He working on ya, from the inside out clap it out Clap it out. Clap it out Now if He working on ya from the inside out clap it out Clap it out and shout "Oooh Wheee!" I wear my shirt inside out so I won't forget that He ain't through, He ain't gonna quit A work in progress, He ain't don with me yet These changes on the inside be legit Yeah, I got one-three, on the keys Hooked up with FCA, met the JOKE Laid down some tracks so that you can see That we're talking about more than just a camp theme For real, we be changing like metamorphosis Got long line of witnesses that support this "B.P" like a new man--shore is Had plans for our life, now our plans are His Chorus: Yo, it's like in a game when the press is on The enemy be on you like the jersey you got on You need a three, but you can't get free Got to first go inside to attract the "D" Yeah! Inside Out, it works every time Get the ball inside and spot the shooter up behind the line And that's the priority for God you see You Got to first go inside for personal victory

4. Grand Marquis Words and Music by Inside Joke Additional Vocals by Kevin Schuer Several yeas ago was doing some car shopping Not very pumped about the cash that I be dropping When baby's momma got a call "How about you buy my car?" it was her Grandpa! Now before I proceed I think you got to understand Buying a sweet ride, was The Joke's plan So when the offer came, I said "no way" But then he made an offer we couldn't turn away So here I am the owner of Mercury I don't believe this is what Allan Jackson mean Cuz I'm floating down the road, homies laughing at me With an airbrushed license plate of his doxin "Barnie" Yeah, "Are them chrome rims? Everybody asking Shoot I wish, my rims are made of plastic Now I truly be the J O K E The for the foreseeable near future i'll be rolling in a Grand Marquis Chorus: He's Got a Mercury Grand Marquis (repeat) M-e-r-c-u-r-y We ain't talking about the planet, we're talking about my ride And that's why, I'm getting love that is out of this world From all the old ladies with the silver curls (holla!) Yeah, I am the youngest man owning a Mercury Big, long, and red: it's a Grand Marquis And if you think I'm joking wait and see Check the age of other owners and you'll believe That there ain't no young folk driving these Unless they rolling undercover for the state police In fact, that's who most think we are People see me coming and they pull over their car All worried that they just caught for speeding It''s true what they say, looks can be deceiving Because I ain't the "po po" and never will be I just happen to get hook up on a Mercury Grand Marquis Chorus: Several years into it, Man it's turned out good Nice roomy ride, V8 under the hood Best of all I can roll six deep Who would have known the back seat fits three car seats! Little G be saying, "Daddy i love this ride I got Emma on the right and Kendy to my side" Shoot it ain't called "Grand" for nothing Bench seat in front allowing for some loving Ha ha, yeah! You know the trunk is big If the man takes our house in the trunk we could live And I just finished getting it all jacked up Curb finders on the side for when I back up Four flat screens rollin up onto the scene Now if there be laughing now its coming from me "How much will take for it? "Man please This be Inside Joke's Grand Marquis

5. The Turtleman Rap Words and Music by Inside Joke Additional Words by Ernie Brown Jr. (The Turtleman) Let me tell you about Kentucky's best kept secret The Turtle Man's a man you have got to see to believe it He's one quarter Shawnee, one quarter Cherokee, One quarter Confederate, the last quarter Yankee People think he's crazy but they can't help but like him No drugs or alcohol will you find inside of him Yet he still will be crawling around up in slimy ponds Kindly like a sight using his arm as a magic wand Arm extended, looking for bubbles in the water Soon as he find em, man he be on em Catching snappers his his game, KY Afield brought him fame Got everybody in the nation knowing his name Throughout the Commonwealth putting turtles to shame No longer just for football, Turtleman drinks Gatoraide At turtle dash man dot come, he getting paid The newest member of the Justice League is Turtleman Chorus: Turtleman, He's the turtleman He be cleaning out them ponds, city folk think he going insane Dang...dang... dang... diggy-dang That's what you'll be saying when you watch the Turtleman 1 Turtle 2 Turtle 3 Turtle 4 Swimming in the ponds where there is turtles galore Down under the water, picking them up off the pond floor With his bare hands until there ain't no more Turtles... yeah, cause that's how he roles Yelling "whew-eh!" out the window cause his horn won't blow No signs of life here, to the next pond he goes You went fishing when you was a kid? So He caught his first snapper at the age of seven His dad threw him in a pond, and he was in turtle heaven just over an hour - had his first turtle out Ernie Brown Jr. was a prodigy no doubt Fast forward, now bagging 300 a year bit over 20 times, but he don't care Because from June to October, Turtleman is after em How does he get his power? Just ask em... Chorus: Trying not to smile, but there's nothing wrong It's just that he knocked his teeth out with a chainsaw But he can still eat em...hmm snapperlicious 7 kinds of meet and you know they nutritious. Steak, beef, roast, the tenderloin is the best If you're on a diet there is fish in it's neck But mostly he's moving turtles from pond ot pond Preventing snappers from doing the cows harm And that's why his fame is growing world wide People watching him on YouTube taking turtles for rides "Look at him bouncing!" Yeah, but it's not him doing it it's the turtle underneath that's got him moving it Kindly like this song is you I guess that you could say that this is a turtle groove "Yo Joke! What do you think he does in the winter?" Wouldn't be surprised if he was training with Splinter!

6. Gold Zone Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry Chorus: We living in the Gold Zone X4 (I want the gold) Yo we work for FCA in an area office We be a 501c3 non-profit And in order to get paid yo we got to raise it Headquarters got colors just to tell if we can make it For example, they got this warning system You in the "Red Zone" the home office be dissing Send you a letter saying "boy you better listen Get some donations or the curb you be hitting" The "Green Zone" that's where most wanna be Got enough cash to focus on the ministry You in the green, that means you'll be alright You're feeling good getting sleep at night Red and green used to be all there be Until The J-o-k-e jumped onto the scene They were tracking our funds out in KC And had to make a whole new category We in the Gold Zone Chorus: Watching MSNBC the Dow going down Ain’t effecting me as I roll through town To all my huddles in my pimped out ride Got 24” rimes bumping system inside… Out.. that's the 09 camp theme All my homies lining up to join my Home Team Used to be hated, now we getting calls from other staff "Joke How did you get your bank? How did you get your cash?" Collecting donations in all kinds of ways Cash, property, gold, rollin 401Ks Shoot… we even making bank from Steer Selling cows in the KY like everywhere You have a golf scramble, our event is better The Joke doing concerts for FCA cheddar And at our banquet, don't need no luck So much cash had to hire and armored truck Shoot dawg, money coming in from all directions A donor just donated a brand new Lexus Impress account filling up bigger than Texas Excuse me, but Bill Gates is trying to text us We in the Gold Zone Chorus: Recession? Don’t know what it mean "Org" blowing up like Rambo III We in the poorest state but you wouldn’t know it Log onto fcagear.com with cash just to blow it Cause we the richest staff in all of FCA We redefined “One Way 2 Play!” (holla!) Yeah, living large in the KY Trading our T's for Armani suits and ties We don't lie, cause this be the truth Need an umbrella for the raining loot Kentucky Staff? If ya feel me say hey We just auctioned off Leon on Ebay We in the Gold Zone

7. Smoke Machine Words and Music by Inside Joke Additional Vocals by G-Lova It was the day after Halloween, the store had a sale Cassius called me up said he found the Holly Grail Well not exactly, but it's the next best thing One for $10, yo it's a smoke machine! I hopped in the car, got there as fast as I could "Should We Get 2?" Yeah I think we should Took them home--only one worked But that's all we need to get the crowd bazerk And that's what happened at our next show The smoke came out and we bust out the door Onto the stage, as if it was as on fire Ski goggles to keep the smoke out of our eyes As the smoke machine spit smoke with all its might You'd thought we'd lit up a case of Marlboro Lights Put the mic to my mouth and started to flow Spitting mad lyrics through the fog and the smoke Yeah, you couldn't see me though Oxygen mask needed for folks on the front row So much smoke filling up the stage We caused Bill Meck to send out a fog delay. Chorus: Inside Joke moving onto the scene Got the crowd hype with his smoke machine All the ladies/fellas let me hear you scream (hey) It's a smoke machine Before we rock the mic we just flip the switch Smoke fills up the stage like crime at Myrill Lynch As I walk onto stage I can hardly breath As the smoke from the machine starts to engulf me And that's the way we like it, you best believe That The Joke and Cassius Clay got a show to bring To accompany our rhymes, this smoke machine is mine Producing more smoke than Mamaw's kitchen at Christmastime Uhh... You know we be bringing the smoke Ain't no need to worry, we ain't taking a toke Cause with this smoke machine, who needs weed? The smoke smells better and it's safer to breath Yeah! At least we're hoping so! Our tour got more coffin than a funeral home And we ain't gonna change, yeah you gonna choke With this smoke machine, Cassius Clay, and Inside Joke Chorus: After our set, all the ladies in tears Was it the smoke in their eyes or the base in their ears? Not really sure, but what I do know Is that they're all lining up begging for some more So we bring this smoke machine to every show Fill it up with fluid, hit the switch and watch it go Until the stage is all filled And all the people gasping for air and their tears start to spill Now everybody in the biz trying to copy From Kanye to Diddy, the rock group Daughtry Now everybody has got to have smoke on their stage And it's all because of me partner Cassius Clay But you and me, we know who was first We the boys that teach'em how the smoke machine works And each and every show, class is in session The more smoke the better--there's your first lesson...fool!

8. The Jesus Cheer Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry and Inside Joke Back in college when I rolled wit The Cats We used to get the crowd going, until they was going whack From chanting cheers, people getting hype From The Fight Song, to yelling "Blue and White" "Go Big Blue" was a big cheer at UK But spelling CATS was the crowd fave C-a-t-s Was the "Y" in Kentucky, along with the best It's all good, until my life got rearranged, Heard a new cheer, went and changed my team With my new team, came a new cheer To let you know who I love, got to make it clear So get ready, buckle up, we going on ride Gonna teach you a new cheer that make you come alive Yeah, you think Rupp can get loud? Just wait till you hear His warriors shout Chorus: (Give me a J) J - you got your J you got your J (Give me an E) E - you got your E you got your E (Give me and S) S - you got your S you got your S (Give me a U) U - you got your U you got your U (give me a S) S - you got your S you got your S What's the spell? Jesus Who's the King? Jesus Who's the Lord? Jesus He's the one that frees us! Cheering for sports, but sports won't bleed So I'm cheering for Jesus cause he died for me Make noise for my team, but for Him i'll scream Called out His name and he set me free Yeah, done been redeemed! Spelling Jesus, cause i can't spell Elohim or El Shaddai or Adonai Praise Him so loud set the church on fire Shoot dawg, He invented sports Even made the wood, that goes on the courts Making me wanna get delirious Too many up in the pews acting all serious While Florida fans be doing the Gator Chomp Tennessee fans singing Rocky Top The Braves cheer with the Tomahawk Chop And the best we do is ring a bell on a rooftop? Well not anymore, because we raising the roof We'll be singing "We will Rock You!" While "We Are Marshall" some may say "We Are Disciples," Can you give a J? Chorus: You might call this a Jock Jam But it's more like praise to the Grate I Am The Lion of Judah, known as The Lamb Blowing His name like the horn of ram Time out, folks getting up for YMCA But we shouting out the name above all names Yeah, any time of the day Because there's only one name by which man might be saved You know it, and that name is Jesus Ain't ashamed of his name, because his name frees us While the world's trying to deceive us Getting us more pumped about sports than about Jesus It' ain't that he needs us Cause he can make the rocks cry out if he pleases But that ain't gonna happen, uh uh no way Cause all his peeps on their feet to say 2 Bits...

9. Boston Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry I knew when I met you I should have left you alone Its been seven years now and you don't come home Up all night and you sleep all day At night is it all pleasure and all play? While I'm sleeping in the bed baby Chorus: Where are you going when i let you out at night (x4) Is it true you got another lover across the street? Cause if you do then maybe there you should eat (spend their money) You used to give me some love and affection (when our love was new) Now you're acting so crazy that you can only live in sections Of the house and it's not the bedroom baby! Chorus: Where are you going when I let you go out at night? Envision you and Mouse living the night life We got a checkered past, but that don't make it right Sometimes wondering if you're doing it just to spite Me, yeah and all that we had You cut the cheese on me, but still took you to my pad I changed up your food, when the food was bad Trying to figure out what has made you mad Could it be, be cause we got you fixed? But you knew going in we wouldn't have no kids Or perhaps its because we tried to toilet train you? It's just I thought that was best given the stank upanya So now here we are, you'd rather be in that house Getting more love from Marshall and Mouse We'll I'm fine with that, look at the cost your costing So long see you later have a good one Boston... Chorus: Laying in the bed turning and tossing While your outside flossy flossing Boston look at the cost that you're costing Boston, Boston yeah...

10. Down With Brotally Words and Music by Inside Joke Additional Vocals by Double Deez and Cassius Clay Driving through Iowa in the winter of 04 Wertz had Beh out on his tour In a old van, down came da snow Wertz said "totally" after Beh said "bro" Beh repeated bro, followed by wertz's totally after minutes of repetition, Wertz said "brotally" "Brotally?" is what Beh said "Brotally!" said Wertz as he shook his head At first they were unsure, but they said again Beh and Wertz were becoming close friends As they said "brotally" till 6 in da morn Everybody knew, yo, this word was born Now five years have passed and broats be all around so many using the word like in surround sound You not broat, just say the word for awhile Next thing you know you living the lifestyle Chorus: Down with brotally (Worldwide Inc., got my "T", can't you see the hunnies looking at me) Down with brotally (Worldwide Inc., and that's why the 50 is coming after me) Brow brow brow your broat, gently down the stream Brotally brotally brotally brotally, you be saying brotally in your dreams Like the dream of Dr. Martin Luther King, I believe Brotally bringing all types of peeps up onto the scene Black, white, yellow, red, brown he don't care The brotal lifestyle be for people everywhere All the hispanic broats rollin through town sayin "holla" Low ridding, drinking a diet broka-brolla Don't matter if you broke or a high rolla Age 99 or riding in a stroller Everybody signing up to be a broat Obama met brotally then he got "hope" This beat so cold, Hawaiian girls need a coat, I guess from now on you can call me "Inside Broat" Chorus: Brotally, that's what I be Hailing from the University of Kentucky Wanna be broat? Time to listen to me I'll teach you how to add the word to your vocabulary First you say the word "bro". then say the word "totally" Say em together real quick and out comes "brotally" Walk up to some someone, say in a grocery Pick up a banana and yell out "brotally" And when they stair at you, smile with confidence Say it again, this is no pretense Then yell it a third time, like there a car you're waxing Then a fourth time like a fax that you're faxing "That don't make sense"... Man I know I think i'm becoming intoxicated from saying the word bro T-a-l-l-y Got a brotal buzz that got me feeling high Better than a high from Colt 45 You be crazy after brotally when before you were shy Take it from me, start using the word, give it a try Cuz I's brotally when I was born and I'll be brotally when I die Chorus: Have you ever met Brotally? He's a person? Yeah dog most speculate he's a Duerson But more than a person brotally is a lifestyle Identified by a shirt that comes in various colors and styles Yeah, they selling, no time to blink Mad cash rolling in to Brotally Worldwide Inc. You know Beh even got one that will fit yo mom Just head on over to www.brotally.com (holla!)

11. Carpet On Ya Chest (Ronald Jenkees Remix to a Remix) Words by Inside Joke Music by Ronald Jenkees "Remix to a Remix" appears on Ronald Jenkees self titled album. Song was used with permission from the master himself.

12. The Fox Song Words and Music by Inside Joke Additional Vocals by Lady K (This song was done for “The Fox” mascot for the San Antonio Silver Stars WNBA basketball team) Chorus: He's the Fox (You know that he rocks) He's the Fox (All the haters he mocks) He's the Fox (The vixens swarm in flocks) (His skills, threads, and rhymes be tighter than Ft. Knox) Tick Tick Tick Tick Tock Time be running out cause here comes The Fox Vertical so high he's the king of blocks So many balls in your face you'll need botox Yeah... this fox be cleaning clocks Moves so fast he don't need no shox All the ladies love him from Brondello to Goldie Lox He's the reason for the Silver Stars rising stocks (Holla!) At home The stars be a winner With The Fox busting moves in The AT&T Center He be the baddest fox pound for pound He be the fox that chased away the hounds "Where to?" Right into a fox hole Stole the ball headed straight for the goal Slam Dunk! Awe yeah! You know he will deliver Who needs a gold fox, when platinum is silver? Chorus: F-o-x he's the king of Tex Vixen start to faint when they see him flex It don't matter that he got a carpet on his chest He's skills been hypnotizing since the days of tape decks! Yeah! Just check'em out o you tube There's a reason this fox got over 5 million views The Star Squad can't even keep up wit his groove And that's not knocking them, cause neither can you (true). So much skills when he on the court The producers at Fox had to create Fox Sports With his sagging shorts, The Fox be living large "How Large?" from the floor up to the silver stars And while this beat be breaking necks, The Fox be banking checks Rolling four deep in a pimped out Lex After a big win, back to his home This fox's hole is in the heart of San Antone!

13. Christmastime At Mamaw's Words by Inside Joke Music by Bobby Perry and Inside Joke Additional Vocals by Mamaw, Little G Lewis, and Emma Kat It's Dec 25th, you know where i be At Mamaw's celebrating Christmas wit my family We got Tito, Jason, Andrea and Joey Kristy, Double Deez, Cassius Clay, and Little G Lady K, Jermaine, Kathy and B.B. Emma, Kendy, Greenly, and Kateastrophe Anticipating what's under the Christmas Tree But before we open presents, it's time to eat Mamaw be making sure everybody stuffed Having no concept of when enough is enough "Heres another biscuit" I done had five! "you'll need some more grave" Mamaw i don't wanna die! Mamaw just can't take now for an answer Done ate enough to stuff Prancer and Dancer Start to get up "That's all you're gonna eat?" My gut looking swoll from the eggs and meat But I eat some more, what can I say? Even though its the first of three meals this day Eating all dis fried food that Mamaw made Da kids begging to get up so that they can play Mamaw fills my plate, Christmas tunes in the background Mistletoe and holly be hanging all around Smoke from the kitchen reminds me of a club Mamaw giving out lots of Christmas Love Chorus: Giving lots of love the Christmas. Just you wait and see I've got lots of surprises underneath the tree After breakfast, you know what time it is This be when the show really begins Underneath the tree there be all kinds of surprises Got me on edge wondering what mine is Reminiscing of her past gifts Like the pecan log roll and potato chip clips Or perhaps another chirping bird clock And a Spaghetti Strainer from the Mini Malls overstock One time she gave me up a plastic egg tray And got matching bath towels for me, Deez and Cassius Clay When I was ten, Mamaw wrapped me up a pound a bacon There's no telling how many blankets she be making An each December when it starts to get cold Got me thinking bout the year she got me a rooster snow globe Not to mention the gift in the egg nog With gifts like these, who needs a yule log? Chorus: So now the time has come to see what Mamaw gave Trying to focus on the real meaning of this day Opened up the present, I'm stunned and amazed With a gift like this what was I to say? In high school, Mamaw got me some santa briefs But i could wear those when all my others weren't clean But this... ain't no way I'm putting these on Mamaw got me a male candy cane Christmas thong!